I dunno why i'm jus so xiao qi.. I dunno why if he dun send me back and goes out to somewhere else i am angry. Jus because he never send me back? I reali have alot of questions to ask myself..
Jus had a very big quarrel with my bebe and he has made up his mind on giving me up and breakup with me. I noe no matter how much i try to stop him from having this decision, once his mind is set he'll not change. I noe everything is jus my fault and i'm the one who caused all these. From the start it was all along me.. But since the cool off period i had found out the solution to change my way of being in this relationship. I dunno who to explain but i jus noe how. But it seems too late to only find the solution to the problem the past 1 week. I had made up my mind and hoped it will work things out soon. Gave myself a month after i found my solution but it seems like i have to change my plan and i only can give myself 3 weeks to make things work out.
I am a ger who treats people differently.. I treat my boyfriend one way, i treat my friends the other way and i treat my close friends another way. Cuz different people have different thinking.. This is wat i feel.. So i dun treat everybody the same way i treat my boyfriend. But since the day i told him i will change i still can't find my solution why i am treating him this way. Until recently i found the solution to the problem? I jus got to realised tat the way i treat him is wrong? I am jus pushing things to the end of the room tat makes him have no way out. It reali feels heart ache to hear him say he wants to give up this relationship. But i noe i have left him with no choice.. I admit tat i am someone who loves to be pampered and cared for like a princess. Everyger hopes for tat.. I noe i can no longer be pampered like a princess and be cared like a small kid anymore. And i am a stoopit gerfriend who always kick a big fuss out of every single little things. I noe i've always been making my bebe angry and pissed off over everything tat i do. Some times i jus dun feel tat i'm wrong until my bebe gets angry and scold me. I am a person who is very slow with my brain. I dun think well and fast enough.. I dunno why am i like tat.. I reali hate myself now.. Jus feel like killing myself ! ! ! Can i?
P.S.: Bebe.. Can we jus be wat we used to? I jus wanna be back to how i used to be.. I wanna hold on to this relationship and let u see the future in us. I reali jus hope tat u can gimmi the 2 weeks to change and be wat i used to. I reali jus found the solution to my problem and i reali wanna give it a try and will never give up. I noe it's hard on u tat every now and den i've been like tat, but soon.. Not anymore.. I promise.. I reali dun wanna breakup please...
Labels: I reali love you
